Te Wahine Atamai

Valli Kalei Kanuha

“As a researcher I was seeking something more: more knowledge, more analysis, and ultimately more understanding of others whose life experiences were similar to mine” (p. 441). I connected deeply to this because it is a great articulation of why some of us, as researchers, choose to be in certain spaces. There’s often a deeper reasoning behind why we do what we do, why we work where we work, why we research what we research; and generally, it is connected to our own personal stories and experiences. I certainly know this to be true of me in that I am passionate about exploring identity as someone who was raised disconnected from parts of themselves, and I have a heart for those who have experienced the same things as me.

This is why I have felt so connected to tangata whenua of Aotearoa, particularly as I have learned te reo Māori alongside other ‘second-language learners,’ I have seen and known deeply that intrinsic mamae, sense of disconnection and ultimately the shame that accompanies these experiences. I think this is what will make me a good researcher, my compassionate intentionality in interacting with people. However, I also really appreciate the author’s thoughts regarding allowing for a level of emotional disconnect from our participants so as to not project our own experience onto respondents and to actually be good “holders of space” (Simpson, 2017, p. 15).

The thoughts in this reading are so relevant to us as Indigenous researchers because it will inevitably be a part of our own journey to navigate this tension and relationship between our personal self and our researcher self. It is a good thing to think about allowing our innate knowledge base and experiences to contribute to building connections, as well as navigating carefully how we do not let that create a barrier to our work that we are doing.