Te Wahine Atamai

Linda Tuhiwai-Smith

Smith’s point about “living in relation” really spoke to me in relation to some of the thoughts I have been having about my Master’s thesis and where I want to take it. I have been thinking about what “identity” means, and how much my up-bringing in a Western, colonial context has contributed to my individualistic and humanistic perspective on the process of identity reclamation. I am so interested in learning about my whakapapa, my island, and where I am from. It poses questions about my identity, who am I, do I belong, what is my positionality in this research? But as I have sat with this and continued to read, it has sparked the question in me of – how am I actually viewing what identity is and means? And, how are colonial individual constructions of identity forming my perspective on my personal journey of identity and Indigenous reclamation?

I feel encouraged to challenge my perspective of what identity means and looks like so that I am not reproducing the colonial impact on my people in the process of my personal reclamation journey. I want to learn what it looks like to reframe identity as relation, not this individualistic goal of chasing my own self-interests, but more pursuing and understanding something I am in relationship with and to. In addition to this, her comments about “positioning” also contribute to some of my thoughts around identity, and pose questions about what I am actually wanting out of my research. If I am to be quite brutally honest, I feel like my intentions are off the bat, quite selfish in that I am yearning for a sense of belonging to a whenua I want to be able to claim as mine. Smith’s questions such as ‘What are your intentions? What capacity are you building in the community?’ make me reflect on how I can work on being in a reciprocal and generous relationship with my whenua and whakapapa, not one of taking for my own individual benefits.